Future Faking

Published by Esteban Devereaux
May 11, 2026 at 5:27 PM MT
Last Updated: May 11, 2026
Estimated Reading Time: 9 minutes

“I don’t need to build the future I promised you. I only need to make you believe in it.”

Future faking is one of the most seductive tools in the narcissist’s playbook.

I study what matters most to The Supply and construct a shared vision so compelling that he begins investing emotionally, financially, and psychologically in a future that may never materialize.

The promise is the product.

Hope is the mechanism.

Your investment is the payoff.

What Is Future Faking?

Future faking is the use of detailed promises about the future to create commitment in the present.

Examples include:

• Starting a business together

• Moving to a new city

• Buying a home

• Getting sober

• Going back to school

• Marriage

• Building a family

The plans may feel specific and sincere.

But they are not supported by consistent action.

How Future Faking Worked in Our Relationship

Once I moved into The House, The Supply and I began discussing an ambitious shared future.

Together, we talked about:

• Renovating the gardens and landscaping

• Attending massage therapy school in July

• Graduating together in January

• Launching a massage practice

• Building wealth

• Strengthening our sobriety

• Expanding our social and professional network

I did more than nod along.

I actively participated.

I offered ideas.

I contributed to the vision.

I behaved as though we were building a life together.

Why the Dream Was So Effective

The future we discussed aligned perfectly with The Supply’s deepest desires.

He wanted:

• Financial success

• A meaningful partnership

• A beautiful home

• Professional reinvention

• Emotional stability

I mirrored those ambitions and positioned myself as his ideal collaborator.

To him, I was not just a boyfriend.

I was a partner in his next chapter.

The Social Investment

Future faking often extends beyond private conversations.

During this period:

• I joined a private social club with The Supply.

• We integrated our lives.

• We spoke openly about long-term plans.

• I bonded with his dog and daily routines.

The more tangible the future appeared, the more emotionally real it became.

The Illusion of Shared Commitment

One of the most destabilizing aspects of future faking is that the narcissist may appear fully engaged.

I seemed:

• Excited

• Focused

• Invested

• Loving

The Supply interpreted my participation as evidence of commitment.

In reality, I was benefiting from the emotional momentum of the vision.

The Parallel Reality

While helping construct this future, I was also:

• Maintaining severe alcohol dependence

• Avoiding accountability

• Cultivating Plan B

• Preparing my exit

The shared dream and the secret escape plan existed simultaneously.

That contradiction is the essence of future faking.

Why Narcissists Future Fake

From my perspective as the narcissist, future faking allows me to:

• Secure your commitment

• Increase your investment

• Trigger hope

• Gain access to resources

• Avoid being evaluated based on present behavior

As long as you are focused on our future, you are less likely to scrutinize my actions today.

Why Empaths Fall for It

Empaths are builders.

When they believe in a shared vision, they:

• Invest emotionally

• Spend money

• Rearrange their lives

• Extend enormous patience

The future becomes proof that the relationship is meaningful.

The Emotional Cost

When the relationship collapses, The Supply does not just lose a partner.

He loses:

• The imagined business

• The school plans

• The shared home vision

• The belief in “what we were building”

That is why the grief can feel so profound.

What I Am Really Doing

From my perspective as the narcissist:

• I learn what you want most.

• I present myself as your perfect partner.

• I participate in your dream.

• I enjoy the benefits of your commitment.

• I leave when the arrangement no longer serves me.

The dream does not need to come true.

It only needs to keep you invested.

Signs You Are Being Future Faked

• The plans are detailed and exciting.

• The commitment feels profound.

• Follow-through is inconsistent.

• Present behavior contradicts future promises.

• You are investing more than they are.

The Hard Question

Ask yourself:

“If none of these promises ever happened, would this relationship still be healthy today?”

If the answer is no, you may be attached to a fantasy rather than a sustainable partnership.

Final Thoughts

Future faking is powerful because it converts hope into commitment.

The narcissist does not need to deliver the future he describes.

He only needs to keep you believing it is just around the corner.

When you start evaluating people based on what they consistently do—not what they enthusiastically promise—the illusion begins to dissolve.

Recommended Articles

• How Narcissists Weaponize Hope

• What Is Narcissistic Supply?

• Love Bombing

• Why You Keep Chasing the Version You Met at the Beginning

• Healing & Recovery After Narcissistic Abuse

You are in a psychological war, and you don’t know it.

Let the games begin.